Any good parent wants what is best for their kid, whether that means helping with school work, volunteering to carpool for soccer games or using the kids as test subjects for a burgeoning cosmetic surgery practice.  Who better to test your skills on than your own kids, right?

ABC News Radio reports that Dr. Michael Niccole has apparently been going all ‘Nip/Tuck’ on his two adopted daughters Charm and Brittani, now both 22 years old, since they were 10 and 18 respectively.

For example, instead of buying her a CD (that means “compact disc,” a increasingly archaic form of listening to music), Dr. Niccole gifted Charm a new ‘innie’ belly button on “Take Your Kid To Work Day.” As a teenager, Brittani was self-conscious about her supposedly undersized breasts so Dad gave her a boob job and some rhinoplasty (read: nose job) for good measure.  Both girls were given regular botox injections as allowance for taking out the trash and doing household chores.  On the plus side, they probably won’t have to change their names once they start stripping.

Niccole’s response to critics of these ethically questionable procedures is that the surgeries were simply “maintenance” in an effort to keep his kids looking young.

Somewhere in the world the parents of contestants on ‘Toddlers and Tiaras’ are giving a standing ovation. Just because they don’t look like the biggest lunatics for once.

[Via ABC News]