Is This The Most Awesome Yard In Wichita Falls?
There is a house, nay, a hacienda, in Wichita Falls that has a yard for the ages. I cannot tell you exactly where it is because our lawyers have, in a voice that reminds me of Charlton Heston, told me that revealing the location would be a no-no.
I happened on the yard this past April as my wife and I were searching for a place to live. Now, after seeing the yard, I take ALL, and I mean ALL out of town guests by this yard to get a look. Especially after a few drinks.
For Starters, I have named the yard “Mexican Disney World”. Now, Mexicans, do not take offense! You will quickly notice that the yard features a donkey, and suspicious looking brown person holding what appears to be a blanket. My wife has commented that it may well be Juan Valdez, the Colombian coffee picker who has migrated north with his donkey. If that is indeed the case, then we are out of Mexico and into wherever Colombia is. (I’m pretty sure it ‘s not in Mexico.)
As a side note, for my family’s Christmas card picture this year, I very much want to get a shot of my two kids riding that donkey wearing Santa hats with Juan Valdez standing lovingly next to them. I mean, just think about what a hit it would be for Aunt Dixie and Uncle Bert to open that card and be greeted with that image. I imagine the exchange would go something like this: Bert- “My God Dixie… THEY’RE ON A FAKE DONKEY”. Dixie – “Hey, Is That Juan Valdez?” See… hilarity at it’s finest. (It’s really the simple things for me)
You’ll also notice in the photos that there is some kind of Mexican/Colombian altar in the middle of the yard. I do not claim to have any idea what the practical purpose of this structure is, but I have a sneaking suspicion that it may have some kind of religious purpose that I am much too white to understand. To date, I have not gotten close enough to check for chicken blood or feathers. I HAVE, however noticed the Christian crosses and Jesus references across the front wall, so I have to assume that maybe it’s just for good, old fashioned communion. I can’t be sure. If I ever get the courage to meet the homeowners, I’ll be sure and ask.
In addition to all that fun and frivolity, there are also lions and tigers guarding the yard up on the fence posts. Now, I can’t speak for the general population, but to me, lions and tigers are more of an African thing. Not really too Mexican or Colombian. Also, curiously enough, a Texas Longhorns football helmet is directly beneath the lion/tiger. (Liger, from here on out) One can only conclude that the family is of Hispanic or African decent and possibly went to UT. Oh yes, they apparently ride Harley’s too.
I definitely think that this is the most awesome yard in the Falls and encourage you to seek it out. You will probably take your out of town guests to see it as well. BTW, it IS better after a few drinks.