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Stupid Criminals

Stupid Criminals

burrito burglar
flickr
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Wichita Falls Burrito Burglar Behind Bars

You know times are tough when we have burrito banditos running rampant around town.

26-year-old Brandon Shane Eustice of Wichita Falls was in jail Tuesday (10/16) after assaulting his father and stealing his $2

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Nunchucks to Face
Photo Courtesy of Winslow Police Department
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Girl Goes Ninja Turtle on Her Crazy Boyfriend

Last week, 33-year-old Christopher Rolling Fox of Winslow, Maine drunkenly busted into his ex-girlfriend's house to confront her, because he thought she was dating a new guy.

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Elephant driver
Photo Courtesy of Newcastle Police Department
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Dumbo is Not the Only One Who Sees Elephants When He’s Drunk

Last week, 31-year-old Samuel Phipps of New Castle, Delaware was caught driving drunk after he swerved on a highway and crashed his 1998 Land Rover into a guardrail.  There are two explanations for what happened.

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Category: Animals, Morons Tags:
Batman
Photo Courtesy of Michigan State Police
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Batman’s Not Dead, He Just Got Arrested In Michigan

33-year-old Mark Wayne Williams of Petoskey, Michigan likes to dress up as Batman, listen to a police scanner, and show up at crime scenes.

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Category: Weird News Tags:
Donation Jar
Flickr Account: Dave Dugdale
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Man Applies for Job Then Steals Charity Donation Box

A man walks into a local pet store for a job application and while he is filling it out he notices a donation box full of money. He decides to steal it, but he forgot one thing.

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Category: Weird News Tags:
Fox 31 Denver, Facebook
Fox 31 Denver, Facebook
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Teen Girl Slips Handcuffs, Steals Police Vehicle and Leads Cops on Merry Chase

It’s tough being young and wild, especially if you live in a small Colorado mountain town. Sometimes kids just have to invent their own kind of fun. Perhaps 18-year-old Shelby Figueroa was thinking just that when she slammed her car into the back of an unmarked police SUV in Clear Creek, Colorado. The five-foot-tall suspect was subsequently detained and placed into the back of another police SUV. And then the real excitement began.

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Onions on burger man
Multnomah County Police Department
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Man Goes Into Rage After Onions Were Put on His Burger

Now don't get me wrong there are certain things I don't like on my burger. I don't like pickles and I ask for, "No pickles on my burger please." It happens sometimes and I get over it. Apparently this guy thinks that messing up his order is inexcusable and threw a fit.

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Category: Weird News Tags:
Waukesha Wisconsin - Gerard Streator has sex with couch
flickr
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Man Arrested for Having Sexy Sofa Time on the Side of the Road

Clearly this guy misunderstood the phrase "more cushion for the pushin'."

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Category: Weird News Tags:
Tiger
Getty Images
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Man Jumps Into Tiger Pen at Bronx Zoo on Purpose

On Friday afternoon, 25 year old David Villalobos was riding the monorail at the Bronx Zoo in New York. David decided to jump out of the monorail, over a 16-foot fence, and into a 400-pound male Siberian tiger's pen.

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Category: Animals Tags:
Pizza
Getty Images
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Man Steals Rare Coins Worth Thousands and Spends Them on Pizza

I feel like this guy defines our Stupid Criminals category. A few months ago, 19-year-old Dakoda Garren of Vancouver, Washington was doing some odd jobs at a home in Woodland, Washington.

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Category: Weird News Tags:
Jack Sparrow
Photo Courtesy of Devon Police Department
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Woman Yells “I’M JACK SPARROW” While Attempting to Steal a Boat

51-year-old Alison Whelan of Devon, England was in court this week for an incident that happened last September.  Alison was on a two-day drinking bender, and high on hallucinogenic drugs. Alison and a friend were looking for a place to crash.

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Michael Turner
Getty Images
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NFL Goes 38 Days Without a Player Getting Arrested and That’s a Record

Apparently the longest an NFL player went without getting arrested was 32 days. Seriously how is that possible? The NFL players can barely go a month without someone getting arrested.

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Category: Sports Tags:

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