The Worst Baby Names From Last Year
Every year it seems that some company takes a look at the most popular baby names in the United States. Not kidcrave.com, though. Nope, they looked over the entire Social Security Administration's list of baby names for 2011 and they were looking for the most obscure, or worst baby names out there. Here's what they found:
Named After Alcohol
There were five girls named Tequila last year, and five boys named Patron. There were also nine girls named Chardonnay and 12 named Abeer. Unfortunately, no record of a Jagermeister or a Goldschlager, although, I must say, I am surprised not to see a Hennessey on the list. Nothing says my girl is going to be a pro at parties quite like naming her after your favorite libation. (???)
Criminal Baby Names
Yo, yo, yo, so you want a little gangsta? these parents gave their little bundles of joy instant street cred with these names. There were 12 boys named Juvenal . . . six named Corleone . . . and five each for the names Capone, Gotti, Innocent, Bates, and Notorious. Now, that baby gonna pop a cap in dat backside.
Named After A Celebrity
There were five boys named Swayze, as in Patrick Swayze. Six girls were named Brees, as in Drew Brees. Five boys were named Draper, like Don Draper who is not a real person, just a charachter on Mad Men. Plus, six girls were named Tiger, possibly after their father. I kid, I kid, but hey, who knows, Tigers scored with more Waffle House waitresses than he's won major championships.
Totally Random Baby Names
I'm not sure how some of these came about other that cocaine is a hell of a drug! Five girls were named Moo, six girls were named Latina, six girls were named Tomorrow, six boys were named Cougar, seven boys were named Tron, and seven girls were named Eh. Eh is a name? That's the sound I make when I find out we're having something for dinner I don't want. Also, I would like to point out that naming your kid Tron is just setting him up to be bullied starting in kindergarten. And moo? let the cow jokes start early, and, unfortunately, often.