Would You Eat Salami Made From Human Celebrity Meat?
You know how people frown upon cannibalism? Well, they do. And here is why – because it is not OK to eat your friends and family. Never has been and never will be. Nevertheless, there is a company that plans to grow meat from the tissue of celebrities. They think that there is a market for this and that you would eat salami made from human meat.
While it sounds like a joke – the company BiteLabs claims they are serious and would love to have a Jennifer Lawrence, Kanye West, and Ellen Degeneres flavored salami. I am assuming they don’t currently have any celebrity volunteers but if they did here is the process for making A-List Salami (I made that up…they should hire me).
We start with top-quality ingredients, and time-honored recipes for the creation of fine cured meats. We mix celebrity and animal meats, grown in house through a proprietary culturing process, into curated salami blends. Starting with biopsied myoblast cells, we grow our healthy, rich, meats in Bite Labs’ own bioreactors.
Remember the Donner Party? Nobody remembers it as an awesome party with great food. It Sucked – and so does this idea.